This is topic Worst Lyrics of the 80's in forum « 80s Music at iRewind Talk.


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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
Once in a Lifetime - Talking Heads

"There is water at the bottom of the ocean."

Really?

Despite this I still love the song and the band.

What are your votes? There must be thousands.
 

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Posted by jdocster McFly you Irish bug (Member # 5752) on :
 
Most of the B52s songs... I like some of them though.
 

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Posted by MelmilevorehilBC (Member # 12166) on :
 
wow, this was priceless
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by jdocster McFly you Irish bug:
Most of the B52s songs... I like some of them though.

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I have to agree with you. If I hear rock lobster on the radio I will smash it despite who's radio it is. No, I am not joking.
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
cheap trick's i want you to want me

i like cheap trick, but not that song
 

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Posted by gordongecko (Member # 4685) on :
 
Toto

"As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti"

It always makes me laugh. I felt like they thought it was really deep. Haha.
 

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Posted by Crash (Member # 7484) on :
 
ROFL. Yup. Pretentious poseurs, those Toto guys.
 

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Posted by gordongecko (Member # 4685) on :
 
I actually really know nothing about Toto but that line always gives me a chuckle.
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
you know now that you mention it, they are trying to sound poetic with that one
 

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Posted by Crash (Member # 7484) on :
 
I actually enjoy some of the bad, overblown, pretentious lyrics in 80s songs. How about this one from REO Speedwagon, "Can't Fight This Feeling":

"It's time we row this ship into the shore...and throw away the oars...forever."

Dreadful.
 

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Posted by aTomiK (Member # 6575) on :
 
Don´t you dare mock the great Toto, one of the greatest bands of all time!
But i guess those guys wrote the lyrics heavily under the influence back in those days
 

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Posted by Crash (Member # 7484) on :
 
ROFL, spirited defense of Toto there, my friend. Toto had some interesting lyrics. After all, here's a band with a hit song about the one guy's girlfriend, "Rosanna" (Arquette).
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
You have to admit that she deserves to get a song written about her.
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
i like toto as well, but that, kilamanjero bit does sound pretentious

crash i agree, speedwagon also a good band, but a cheesy line

i agree with you lomax, i can see the inspiration for a song

a little off the subject here but, do you guys think sandra bernhard ever inspired any tunes?
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
what the heck is a karma chameleon by the way? would this fall under the catagory?
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
It just falls under worst song ever!

What was I watching the other day? The guy said why don't they just call him girl george. I can't remember what it was but it gave me a good laugh.
 

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Posted by Crash (Member # 7484) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Bernie_Lomax:
You have to admit that she deserves to get a song written about her.

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Indeed!!!
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
I would love to walk up to her and just tear her clothes off. Literally.
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
which do you guys like better rosanna or patricia?
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
i gotta go with rosanna myself, she's more sultry
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
Both in their prime? Yes, I would go for Rosanna on a sultry night for sure. Patricia is very nice though. She looks great in True romance, that's for sure.
 

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Posted by gotta go back (Member # 9818) on :
 
Watch The Wrong Guys and you will probably choose Rosanna.
 

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Posted by gotta go back (Member # 9818) on :
 
Hey Bernie..Whoever gave you a 3 star rating should lose their rating privileges. i think you deserve better
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
I will check it out just to get a peak. Does she get her kit off?

Yeah, this rating system is funny cos I have given new users that I think are cool 5 stars and then noticed that shortly after they have a rating of 3. So someone has rated them 1 for it to average out at 3.

I gave you 5 ages ago by the way

For a dead guy I ain't getting much slack

Moderators: If you can find the 1 star bandit, immediately terminate their accounts. I implore you
 

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Posted by gotta go back (Member # 9818) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by gotta go back:
Watch The Wrong Guys and you will probably choose Rosanna.

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WHOOPS!! The movie with Rosanna Arquette is The Wrong Man not The Wrong Guys. Sorry 'bout that.
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
i had three stars for the longest time, some how i went to four. just like fungus i grow on people
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
Is that a quote from Private Parts?
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
if it is, i didnt get it from there, it just came to me so i wrote it down
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
Cool, it's just that I watched it the other day and he said it.

It's a good movie. Howard Stern is one funny dude.
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
We built this city:

It make me want throw up violently.

The whole song just has the worst lyrics I have ever heard. Just terrible.

And don't even get me started on that traffic-copter
 

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Posted by aTomiK (Member # 6575) on :
 
Just read an article about Jefferson Starship-Starship
and they said that people have always misunderstood the "We Build This City" lyrics.

I think that it was a good band, especially the Love Among the Cannibals cd
but it was more a Mickey Thomas solo album anyway.
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
I think it may just be there attempt at trying to defend their ultra lame song.
 

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Posted by aTomiK (Member # 6575) on :
 
Haha, most probably
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
I have always like their song Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now but I suspect like most people it's because it reminds me of Mannequin.
 

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Posted by aTomiK (Member # 6575) on :
 
It´s a nice tune.

I´ve had this love/hate relationship with Mannequin.
Liked it in the 80s, hated it during the 90s and now i like it again.
Maybe i just watched it too many times back in the day...
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
Yeah, it's a good movie.

I love Andrew McCarthy and James Spader is awesome too in this movie. Kim is good back in the day before she got all pretentious in Sex and the City.
She was great in Big Trouble also.

I love Spader's quote: Screw your dog! Makes me laugh every time
 

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Posted by aTomiK (Member # 6575) on :
 
Oh boy, Captain Harr.. i mean G.W. Bailey and his dog. What a perfect pair
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
we bulit this city is one of those tunes i like but i never paid much attention to the lyrics,


its kinda like bay city rollers, saturday night, i turn up the volume on the radio whenever it plays, i get really cranked, singing along with the song, and they really aint saying much except how much they like saturday night
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
since watching the movie manaquin, i would be really open to a manaquin coming to life, before i imagine it would be creepy, but if she looks as good as catrall who cares
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
Package,

Here's another Saturday Night tune for ya:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lelsyP9qL2I
 

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Posted by gordongecko (Member # 4685) on :
 
Whoever finally rated me, I appreciate you!! Haha.

Got to go with Rosanna myself.
 

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Posted by Bernie_Lomax (Member # 8571) on :
 
I did a few weeks back.

I thought to myself this guys cool and how could nobody have rated him in 6 years.
 

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Posted by Zigyma7ik (Member # 12351) on :
 
Uhm comes to mind..

Rockwell - Somebody's watching me.
 

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Posted by gordongecko (Member # 4685) on :
 
Bernie, well thank you kind sir. In return I have rated you back! Ya I was starting to worry I smelled funny or something.

New Kids on the Block - Hangin Tough.....

Listen up everybody if you wanna take a chance
Just get on the floor and do the New Kids dance
Don't worry about nothing cause it won't take long
We're gonna put you in a trance with the funky song

Terribleness
 

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Posted by P_a_u_l (Member # 1022) on :
 
It's a lengthy post, so bear with me....

Why I hate Men At Work’s Down Under so very very much.

Let’s start with a reproduction of the lyrics, copyright whoever first wrote them (disclaimer: they ripped off the tune, so I’m leaving nothing to chance….)

Traveling in a fried-out combie
On a hippie trail, head full of zombie
I met a strange lady, she made me nervous
She took me in and gave me breakfast
And she said,

“Do you come from a land down under?
Where women glow and men plunder?
Can’t you hear, can’t you hear the thunder?
You better run, you better take cover.”

Buying bread from a man in Brussels
He was six-foot-four and full of muscles
I said, “Do you speak-a my language?”
He just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich
And he said,

“I come from a land down under
Where beer does flow and men chunder
Can’t you hear, can’t you hear the thunder?
You better run, you better take cover.”

Lyin’ in a den in Bombay
With a slack jaw, and not much to say
I said to the man, “Are you trying to tempt me
Because I come from the land of plenty?”
And he said,

“Do you come from a land down under?
Where women glow and men plunder?
Can’t you hear, can’t you hear the thunder?
You better run, you better take cover.”
Yeah!

Living in a land down under
Where women glow and men plunder
Can’t you hear, can’t you hear the thunder?
You better run, you better take cover!

Living in a land down under
Where women glow and men plunder
Can’t you hear, can’t you hear the thunder?
You better run, you better take cover!


There you have it. I’ll allow you a moment to pause and regain your strength, before I expound my theories on the pitiful words you’ve just read…. right, that’s all done. So OK – here’s the plot. Let’s start with verse 1:

The male lead is…. somewhere unspecified, but he’s driving down a road in a clapped out VW Type 2 van, and he’s out of his skull on skunk (which would explain why he has forgotten which country he’s in, I guess). Suddenly, some weird woman appears, and rather than report him for driving under the influence, or running, she offers him a fry-up. Then she starts on about sweaty girls and criminals, so you KNOW she’s talking about Australia. She finishes off with a quick weather report before telling him, a little too politely, to bugger off….

So verse 2, and our hero pops over to Belgium, and (like true non-stereotypical Aussie blokes) buys bread. Not beer, which would be easier, more readily available, and in character, but bread. And from a baker built like Dolph Lundgren in Rocky 4. Personally, I’ve always believed that Brussels would offer a different kind of muscles, but possibly his experience with the weird female fry-cook has influenced him strangely….. Anyway, this big butch baker turns out to be a more typical Aussie bloke, interested mainly in lager and vomiting. But still interested in the weather forecast, for some reason….

Finally, in verse 3, we end up in India. Actually in Mumbai - which would cause them problems with rhyming the next line these days – in some kind of den (probably something like The Snug from Coronation Street’s Rovers Return). With something called a Slack Jaw. Urban Dictionary describes a ‘slack jaw’ as an extremely ignorant, possibly inbred, person usually of rural heritage. So strange women, burly breadmakers, and redneck idiots. These days, we’d probably just say “Big Brother” and leave it at that….

Anyway, someone tries to tempt our man (presumably with half a pint of Mild and a pickled egg) only to be reminded that there is lots of beer and some impressively large eggs back home. Then we hear again about the sweaty girls, the criminals, the weather, etc. etc.

OK – here’s the tune.

Think ‘Kookaburra Sits In The Old Gum Tree’. That’s the tune. Apparently, when the song was written (or shortly after at a rehearsal, when they were all high as… well, as Kookaburras) they just started playing this tune. And in the THIRTY YEARS that follows, nobody in the band thought to say “that’s not the tune we wrote, that’s that other song”. It’s a bit like Status Quo suddenly stopping and realising that they’ve been singing the words to Rocking All Over The World, but the tune to Captain Pugwash. Cue repayment of much wrongly-earned royalties.

But I want to gloss over these points. Yes the lyrics are dire, and the tune was plagiarised. But that’s not the main point. The main point is that it’s a dire, dreary dirge of a song, with meaningless, pointless, soul-less lyrics, which was clearly released to cash in on the UK’s inexplicable mid-80s mania for all things Aussie brought on by Neighbours, Crocodile Dundee, and the Ernest movies. If you’re unfamiliar with Ernest, think of a cross between Joe Pasquale and Albert Steptoe, then remove all the intellect and machismo.

This song reminds me of all that was bad about the decade I love. It’s a flickering neon sign highlighting that the 1980s wasn’t an unqualified success story style-wise. And it remains the only song I’ve ever interrupted by lifting the record from the turntable and snapping it in half.

A thing I’d gladly do again, if you askedme nicely enough...
 

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Posted by Logan 5 (Member # 1467) on :
 

quote:

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which was clearly released to cash in on the UK’s inexplicable mid-80s mania for all things Aussie brought on by Neighbours, Crocodile Dundee, and the Ernest movies. If you’re unfamiliar with Ernest, think of a cross between Joe Pasquale and Albert Steptoe, then remove all the intellect and machismo.

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quote:

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Originally posted by KING 80'S:
Taking Care Of Business - Bachman-Turner Overdrive - " It's as easy as fishing to be a musician." Definately one of the worst lyrics I've heard.

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And apparently the inspiration for the John Candy SCTV sketch, "Gill Fisher, the fishin' musician."
 

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Posted by The Good Package (Member # 9492) on :
 
hey gordon i just read where you mentioned hanging tough before me, just call me johnny come lately
 

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